Monologue: Falling Out With God
You're a son of a bitch, you know that? She spends ten years trying to get sober, and just when
she starts getting better you hit her with a drunk driver? What is that supposed to be a joke or
something? What the hell did I ever do to you? I tried to be a good person. I never stole, I never
used your name in vein, I honored my mother and even my father, no matter how many times he
hit me or told me that I was a burden to him. That's what you wanted, isn't it? I tried to help
people; I always worried more about everyone else than I did myself. That wasn't enough for
you? Yea, I screwed up every once in a while, does that mean I deserve this?
I read every page of my Bible. It talked about what a loving, compassionate God you are.
That's got to be one of the biggest crocks of all time. You know what I think? I think you're a
pathetic fraud. I think have a bunch of self-righteous surrogates who go out and con people into
worshiping your glory and your awesomeness and then, just when they have their guard down,
you pull a stunt like this. That's not love, that's not compassion. That pre-meditated violence.
Everyone's been telling me that it was "your will". I guess that's what people say when they can't
pull a scripture out of their ass to explain this kind of crap. I swear if I hear one more person tell
me that they're going to pray for me...why weren't they praying for me before? Where were you
when dad came home drunk every night and pulled me out of bed so he could smack me around
for an hour?
(Sarcastically)
"I'll pray for you".
You know I prayed, too. I prayed every night. And look where it got me. Following the rules,
being a good little boy; lot of good that did me. I did everything I knew to do to be a good person
and this is what I get? A big 'screw you'? Meanwhile the son of a bitch that killed her goes free,
you know why? His idiot lawyer got him off on a technicality. What kind of just God lets that
happen?
You know what I feel like? I feel like every single person that ever told me how great you were fed me some great big lie. I feel like they were all just salesmen selling me some piece of crap that didn't really work like they said it would. Oh sure it looks nice. Everyone else is buying it, so it must be great.
So what now? I'm just supposed to go through what's left of my life praising you, waiting for you
to drop the next anvil on my head like a vengeful coward? Is that the price for eternal salvation?
You're not worth it.
she starts getting better you hit her with a drunk driver? What is that supposed to be a joke or
something? What the hell did I ever do to you? I tried to be a good person. I never stole, I never
used your name in vein, I honored my mother and even my father, no matter how many times he
hit me or told me that I was a burden to him. That's what you wanted, isn't it? I tried to help
people; I always worried more about everyone else than I did myself. That wasn't enough for
you? Yea, I screwed up every once in a while, does that mean I deserve this?
I read every page of my Bible. It talked about what a loving, compassionate God you are.
That's got to be one of the biggest crocks of all time. You know what I think? I think you're a
pathetic fraud. I think have a bunch of self-righteous surrogates who go out and con people into
worshiping your glory and your awesomeness and then, just when they have their guard down,
you pull a stunt like this. That's not love, that's not compassion. That pre-meditated violence.
Everyone's been telling me that it was "your will". I guess that's what people say when they can't
pull a scripture out of their ass to explain this kind of crap. I swear if I hear one more person tell
me that they're going to pray for me...why weren't they praying for me before? Where were you
when dad came home drunk every night and pulled me out of bed so he could smack me around
for an hour?
(Sarcastically)
"I'll pray for you".
You know I prayed, too. I prayed every night. And look where it got me. Following the rules,
being a good little boy; lot of good that did me. I did everything I knew to do to be a good person
and this is what I get? A big 'screw you'? Meanwhile the son of a bitch that killed her goes free,
you know why? His idiot lawyer got him off on a technicality. What kind of just God lets that
happen?
You know what I feel like? I feel like every single person that ever told me how great you were fed me some great big lie. I feel like they were all just salesmen selling me some piece of crap that didn't really work like they said it would. Oh sure it looks nice. Everyone else is buying it, so it must be great.
So what now? I'm just supposed to go through what's left of my life praising you, waiting for you
to drop the next anvil on my head like a vengeful coward? Is that the price for eternal salvation?
You're not worth it.
